my sweetest friend, everyone I know goes away in the end

My empire of dirt

 * * * 

 I hurt myself today 
 to see if I still feel 
 I focus on the pain 
 the only thing that's real 
 the needle tears a hole 
 the old familiar sting 
 try to kill it all away 
 but I remember everything 

 what have I become? 
 my sweetest friend 
 everyone I know 
 goes away in the end 
 you could have it all 
 my empire of dirt 

 I will let you down 
 I will make you hurt 

 I wear my crown of thorns 
 on my liar's chair 
 full of broken thoughts 
 I cannot repair 
 beneath the stain of time 
 the feeling disappears 
 you are someone else 
 I am still right here 

 what have I become? 
 my sweetest friend 
 everyone I know 
 goes away in the end 
 you could have it all
 my empire of dirt  

 I will let you down 
 I will make you hurt 

 if I could start again 
 a million miles away 
 I would keep myself 
 I would find a way 

 * * *